It's been about a week, and I can tell you, that I'm still way behind. Maybe even further behind and it's a terrible feeling. I'm in this war with myself with doing things that are fun and good, and getting myself organized for that calm feeling every type-a personality person requires to function regularly.
The boys socks are still not put away, laundry is still in piles (clean & dirty), toys are picked up thanks to Wonderful Husband, bills are unpaid, groceries were not bought this weekend, packing for camping this weekend is not done...work...oh yea...work.
I was going to get on top of things this weekend, but jumped ship and went to the White Sox versus Cubs game with my sister after she called with a last minute opportunity to join her. How could I pass it? I couldn't! So, I enjoyed the day with her, went out for dinner, and Wonderful Husband picked up all the toys, bathed the kids and put them to bed.
Today I felt like absolute crap - I forgot the eldest's lunch. We have money on his hot lunch account, but he prefers to have a sack lunch every day. Also, when you get a hot lunch, it has to be 'ordered' in the morning so they have enough for all the students.
I was behind again this morning (no surprise), when my mom picked up the eldest, I sent him without a lunch. "I'll be at his school this morning to volunteer, I'll bring it then." were my closing words.
Well, time got away from me. Suddenly it was 9:35 & I needed to shower and get to school by 9:45. Yes, even shower. I got out the door at 9:44, to school at 9:48. I played these reading games with 5 groups of the special ed kids, which ends when the lunch bell rings. BRRRR says the bell. OH MY GOSH! I FORGOT HIS LUNCH!
My child, who is so sensitive, has one teacher's aide run down to the cafeteria to see if they can add a hot lunch. The teacher hands me a pop-tart (her arsenal of back ups for those students who don't have a lunch), and I see my son look in his backpack with utter confusion as to where his lunch box is. I was proud of him, he didn't cry, get upset or anything. We got it all worked out.
It's only 11:30 on Thursday and I feel like I've already had a full day and there is a lot more on my dance card. This makes me feel sorry for myself, I will admit. I know it's my choice to keep up my career and have a family, but experiencing consecutive days, even weeks, like this has me seriously contemplating if it's really worth it in the long run.
The jury is still out. Let's see what happens over summer break where there hopefully a bit less to balance. It was just about this time last year that I hit my rock bottom, so maybe it's just the 'season.' Let's hope this week is rock bottom, because once you are there...the only place there is to go is up.
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